Another Tuesday, another Tuesday Topics! We have this one and one more, and it is never too late to link up!
Today the two letters I would like to write are both to younger me. Now, I am a believer in things happening so that you can learn from them and not living in the past, but there are somethings that do nag...that you wish you could change.
Here are my two letters...
I wish you would have known how great you were in high school.
Sure, it’s the land of hormones and black eyeliner, but you are gifted. Sure, there are those people who didn't understand you, but you also tried to stretch yourself and did it moderately successfully. They were just jealous, but jealousy is something we never think of in high school. We just think that everyone else is different and no one could possibly understand who we are or what we are going through.
I think high school was easier for you because you found yourself. You went through the strange scary phase during your horrendous middle school years. Earlier than most...
For a young high schooler, you were dang independent and strong; you were positive and (for the most part) didn't care if people didn't like you. You were going to do and be who you wanted to be in high school. It led you to some of the greatest experiences anyone could have in high school.
You met your husband… well, future husband. You taught him and he taught you and you two became two incredible people. But let's go on to what I really want to talk about...what you took for granted.
You were in the best shape of your life even though your diet consisted of quesadillas and bagels. You should have been more confident in your own skin!
You desperately wanted to be good enough, whatever good enough is for a 16-year-old with all the opportunities in the world knocking on her door. You wanted to be a good singer, a good student, a good swimmer, and for some reason you even tried to be a good tennis player (well you wanted to have something to bond with your sister on, but it was a feeble attempt.)
I wish you would have just given the focus you did on school and put more focus from tennis, choir, student government and put that all towards swimming. You could have been an amazing swimmer and found that enjoyment you wanted. You were fingertips from that.
Posting this, I hope someone reads this and evaluates themselves, knows that they are worth it, and puts into context what is important.
If you could go back and change something, what would you change?
You are a big sister. This is your first time being a big sister. Who knew, it could have been your last (thankfully not). It is a big job, and you didn't know that. Other people seem to have understood that being a big sister is a heck of a responsibility. Did you feel it then, or are you just feeling it now? Now that you feel responsible for your sister's mishaps, successes, and relationships?
You were elated when she would ask you something she was afraid or embarrassed to ask the real grown-ups. But you probably acted like those grown-ups: judgmental, questioning, and worrying. Would she continue to ask you for any advice or questions? Not when you act like that.
You had a bit of a temper. What made you so angry? Do you blame anyone for not wanting to be around you, let alone trust you?
You acted like the little sister instead of the big one. It was her job to snub you when you were too old or uncool for her friends/music/etc... But instead you were too cool for her. It should have been her because behind that curtain of "too cool for you," she still would have looked up to you and come back in the quiet moments to share secrets with you. Since you snubbed her, you never had this moment, so she snubbed you too.
Then you grew and as you became older, you really wanted greatness for your sister so badly. You wanted her to ask you questions you already had answers to, you wanted her to become your best friend. Your sisters taught you how to handle responsibility, lead, and be a team player.
Posting this, I hope someone realizes how truly special their siblings are. The best thing you can be is there.
Link up your letters below!